Why do we have so many "priorities?"
There's a Saturday night coming up. And you and I are invited to 10 parties. You pick 1 and tell another host you might show up, and I decide to go to all 10. Who do you think is going to have a better time?
You will!
I'm certainly not going to have a boring time. I'm safe, because if a party's boring, I'm out of there and on to the next twenty minutes later. But I'm not going to have an amazing night because I didn't commit, I didn't invest, I didn't settle down and say "I think this is where I want to be and what I want to do."
Why do we have so many "priorities?"
Safety And Fear
There are many reasons, but I think one of the big ones is that priorities, goals, and projects…they all serve as crutches…
There's safety in spreading ourselves thin. And safety is one of the reasons we surround ourselves with so many "priorities."
It's frightening to pick one thing and say "I think this is important, and I'm going to devote my time to it." It's frightening to say to others and to ourselves. What if we fail? Will people think less of us? What if it doesn't work out? What if it turns out to be a bad idea?
It's safe to dabble, but spreading yourself thin will get you nowhere.
The other option—making a stand, deciding that this one thing is important and investing time and pride in it—that's frightening. But it's also awesome!
Ego
We also surround ourselves with stuff and priorities because they make us feel important, busy, and accomplished.
Five years ago, I was drowning in projects and priorities. I found one of my typical "priority" lists in a diary and it takes up an entire page. There are over 30 things listed, including:
- teaching myself more German
- working on a novel
- finishing an album
- lose 20 pounds
- run four times a week
- finish a philosophy audio course
- learn to speed read
- finish a programming project I had started
- sew a new wardrobe
- raise my shorthand speed to 120wpm
- learn 10 new words each week
- teach myself guitar
- learn to bookbind my own journal
- and on and on…
This isn't a list of priorities! This is just a list of neat stuff. Was this exciting? Yes. Did I accomplish a lot back then? In a way. I did a lot back then. But there was no way I had time to do all of these well.
Compare that to my list of priorities now:
- SimpleRabbit.com and another blog I'm working on
- getting admitted to university for a second degree
- minimizing my life further
- reading
This might seem less "exciting" and "accomplished." It's less to brag about. But I actually have time and energy for them. I'm actually doing a good job with them.
There are other things in my life of course. They just aren't priorities. I don't allow them to take space, time, or energy from my real priorities. If they happen, nice. If they don't, fine.
For me it was frightening to give up this laundry list of priorities. These things were important to my pride, but they could never be important to my life…not when they were on a list a page long.
Minimalism Starts With Priorities
If you have 40 priorities, when you set out to declutter, you're going to hold on to junk for 40 major activities. You'll continue to be weighed down by everything you own, and you'll continue to be weighed down by everything you try to do.
If you have more than a handful of priorities in your life, I have a few questions for you:
Why are you holding on to all your priorities?
What can you get rid of?
You can't honestly excel in all of these at once. Would you rather kick butt in 4 things, or flounder in 40?
I'd like to kick butt!
